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I’ve been dreading writing this letter for multiple reasons:

1. How do you make something after you’ve made a good thing?

2. How do I measure up to the expectations that people have of this letter and, by extension, me, with my words?

3. What if I am a fraud?

From last week Monday, these are the questions that have been swirling in my mind. And I think I have the answers - some of the answers, at least.

How do you make something after you’ve made a good thing? Easy. You just make it. Well, easy in theory. There’s always the fear and the impostor syndrome that comes after making something phenomenal - the fear that you’ve peaked, that your next work would not measure up to what has already been produced. But like Will Smith said, “Everything you want is on the other side of fear”, so I do it regardless and in spite of the fear. And that’s why this letter is going out.

How do I measure up to the expectations people have of this letter and, by extension, me, with my words? That one, I do not have a complete answer to. The easy and straightforward answer is to show up and keep showing up. But I harbour a fear that my showing up would require more from me than I know how to give. That’s by the way; we move regardless.

What if I am a fraud? This one was my favourite to answer. If I am a fraud, and I am not really good at anything, then I must be a really good fraud. See, fraud is an art as well as a science. Being a good fraud goes beyond telling people you are something; it’s embodying that thing so well that people can already tell you are the thing before you tell them you are the thing. So even if I know nothing and am nothing but a fraud, I am a damned good fraud.

On Life

I am currently writing this letter in Fu’ad’s house. I call Fu’ad my reluctant mentor because I had to worm and weasel my way into his mentorship. The first time I met Fu’ad, well, informally met Fu’ad, he was taking a class in 2020. Great class on storytelling, by the way. At the time, he was the editor-in-chief at Zikoko, arguably the biggest teller of authentic Nigerian stories.

After the class, I made a tweet.

Three years and some months later - Fu’ad just made an archivi.ng email account for me. Manifesting huhn?

This brings me into archivi.ng, a project that has my heart. Archivi.ng is digitising and making accessible Nigerian newspapers from 1960-2010. Well, version 1 at least. Nigerian history is so complex and too rich for us not to have it at the tip of our fingertips. With V.1, you can search up anything, and if it appeared in PM News from 1994 till 2010, you will find newspaper clippings and an AI-summarised version of what the newspaper says. While v1 isn’t perfect, it’s a start to what could be so much more if we put our minds to it. Check out the website, tell your friends, leave feedback, and if you can donate/volunteer with us, we’d love to have you.

I went to Ibadan during the weekend, to see a play and to see my friend Milo. Highlights from my trip - Ibadan has bikes that can go literally anywhere. Anywhere at all. I took a 30-minute bike to the train station. Even though my thighs hurt like mad, it was so worth it.

On Books

I just finished reading Dead Poets Society. Full disclosure, I only started reading it because of the Marauders edits with the sound. I haven’t finished the movie, but an hour cannot pass without me thinking, “O Captain, my Captain, you will be missed.”

Dead Poets Society is a book on what happens when you tell people there is more to life than the life they have been living. Some people take to it like fish to water, and try as they might, they cannot go back to where they came from. It reminds me of something my friend Rara said a long time ago, “You do not know you have been suffering until you taste ease.”

That’s certainly something to think about.

On Music

I’ve been in love with the Jealous remix with Tinashe. It’s old but it’s gold. I really want to play karaoke to this song and sing it terribly.

Lemonade

My lemonade was definitely Ibadan. Do you guys know Lagos stinks?? It stinks badly. Go to Ibadan or Abeokuta for fresh air, please.

I will definitely be going back there as soon as I can get time off.

Have a good week,

Zia.